I'm so melodramatic. About 20 minutes after my last post was finished he rung me.
To be fair it was still pretty rude since it was midnight, and I'd spent my whole night sat by the phone. He said he hadn't rung sooner because the party was crap and hardly anyone was there, but it's still quite rude.
I went and met him at like half 12 (I must sound so desperate, but I knew I'd regret it if I stayed home and did nothing). He was kind of drunk, but he gave me some vodka so I was a bit tipsy.
We kissed, a lot.
At one point he pulled me onto his lap, then I instantly went really weird and tried to make an excuse to move so I wouldn't squash him. Then we started talking about weight and he said I was "normal". Then he quickly said I was 'gorgeous' or some shit like that because he knew I was offended. I must have sounded crazy being offended that he doesn't think I look underweight (which I'm not so all he did state a fact).
I'm definitely making sure I get rid of my stomach asap. If anything with him goes further then I want to be able to stand him having his arm around me without wanting to cry, or have him pick me up without being terrified (he picked me up yesterday, it was horrible).
I think I'm meeting him again today, I think he said something about the cinema, and if not that then he's said all week that we're going to drinks tonight, it's a definite plan so he better not cancel.
I'm barely eating today I've decided. If I'm seeing him tonight then I don't want to be bloated and disgusting. But then again I don't want to get horribly drunk because I haven't eaten. God sake, life is so bloody difficult. Haha.
I love you all, thank you for my comments on the last post, it's amazing to know that you have my back when I'm feeling like crap.
<3 I knew he would call! Ah I am so glad it turned out ok! And yeh I am the same I hate anyone touching my stomach and get terrified of sitting on laps.. eek.
ReplyDeleteHave fun tonight - try to not get to drunk chick <3 xx
Darn it, lol. For the time being I take back what I said about him being an asshole. He is forgiven and I am sorry I bad mouthed him. Come on dude next time sent a text or something about a time frame. IS that so hard to do.
ReplyDeleteI am glad the date went well and everything. You sure you don't want to ask him where are things headed? Sounds like it could be getting serious but I could be over reading this too. Then I also don't want you to start falling for him and then he says out his mouth " oh this was just a casual thing" Then I will be really pissed.
I need to take that attitude towards my husband. I see him everyday and yet I still seem to have a problem getting the weight off. No worries. I will win this war against fat!
You may resume your feelings of dislike. He cancelled today.
DeleteI'm so confused now. I want to ask him where it's going, but I don't want him to think I'm being too full on. But I don't want to just be used and hurt.
It's good you can feel comfortable around your husband.
WE can win this war together!