I just purged dinner. I need to get out of the house more often, how can I avoid food if I'm sat in a house literally stuffed with food all day? I had no plans and therefore no excuses ready as to why I didn't want dinner.
My mum watched me eat every mouthful of dinner, and when I finished she said: "How much do you weigh now?" She looked really menacing. Luckily my sister jumped in with this new app she found where she can find what country averages at the same weight as me (I really don't know the point of it either). I told her it changes between 8st 11lbs and 9st 4lbs. She of course put in the highest weight I told her, and said that people always say their weight is lower than what it actually is so I must be lying. She's so annoying, just because she's put on about 3st doesn't mean she can insult my weight constantly to make her feel better about herself.
I waited a while after eating before I purged, because my bathroom really isn't at all soundproof, I waited until my sister went out to buy some chocolate and alcohol, and then ran all the taps. I know I waited too long and most of the calories will have gone in. Fuck sake.
Fuck it, let me drown my self hatred in some thinspo, which will be shortly followed by a large amount of the alcohol my sister just bought. I hope you're all having a more successful Summer than me.
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Again: I'm sorry if I stole any of these photos of any of you lovely people, comment and I'll delete and remove any photos.
i hate it when my family ask about my weight..:( poor you... i hate being watched while i eat. my family pretty much have got used to me not eating with them.. and lol what is the actual point of that app?? haha.. ridic.. much love! x
ReplyDeletei personally LIKE that your posting so much...reading this gives me something to do instead of thinking about food. i obviously also have way too much free time. boy, i need a life. i know ill have more of a social life once im skinnier. by the way, love that thinspo. i need to start posting some...
ReplyDeleteI am about 150 lbs and both my mom and one of my little sisters weigh a lot more than me but I know what it's like. I thought my face was losing some baby fat and the jealous girl I live with told me it hadn't changed at all. She may have lost more weight than me, but I am still smaller than her and she hates dieting so much she got down to 160-something and said her body wasn't meant to be skinny. But she watches what I eat and asks me how much I weigh and if I get any smaller she will start telling people, oh yeah she's too skinny. She's effed up and has an eating disorder... Because she is jealous. That's all there is to it. She can't look like me no matter how hard she tries. :) The fact that your sister has to constantly try and make herself feel better by putting you down means that you are succeeding!
ReplyDeletexoxo
I like that you're posting a lot - it means I've got lots to read, even if I am shitty at commenting :) That sucks about your sister - I hate it when people randomly ask weight, and judge on it :-/ Just shows how insecure they are in theirselves!
ReplyDeleteHope you're okay
xxBella
Keep posting lots if it helps, we will all read whatever you write :) Try not to let it get to you, if you act out of character they will get suspicious, so keep calm :) And thankyou for your lovely comment :) it means a lot xx
ReplyDeleteI love your posting so much! It helps so much to know that someones going through the whole family "how much do you weight today?" thing. It's horrible and i feel so bad for you. Keep it together, and thank you for your wonderful comments on my blog :)
ReplyDeleteXOXOXOXO take good care of yourself
-featherlight